On my way out the door for early morning yoga, my eyes flash to a familiar sign:
Today it invokes a sigh, a shrug of defeat, an “I can’t say ‘Yes’ any more times or I will explode” sort of moment. The thing is, when I wrote that sign (inspired by this post) it was about the way we frame things, not about biting off more than we can chew. It was about a sense of abundance, of seeing the beauty of every situation. It was not, I repeat, NOT about agreeing to every opportunity, every invitation, or every idea that comes my way. Katherine Marguerite do you hear me?
My feet push into my yoga matt, my muscles try to stretch and loosen. My mind is refusing to budge though, holding tight to the stiffness in my shoulders as it replays perceived decisions waiting to be made. It’s not just the cracked and splitting skin of my fingers where this internal frustration is trying to get out of my body – all week long I’ve been able to feel decisions about my future rising up and hammering their way into the world.
When I wrote the note that I see every time I leave my house, what I meant to focus on was the importance of our viewpoint and the power “yes” can have. However, it has also served to draw my attention to the importance of “No.” What we say no to defines us more than the things that we say yes to because every time we say no, we open a door that wasn’t there before. When we say yes, we are only walking through a doorway that already existed.
After yoga there is breakfast at Mo:Le with Hayley Rosenberg, lunch at Zambri’s with Klàdìa & Kamille, and tea with Tookie later in the evening. It feels as if I talk all day, stretching and loosening my circular thoughts in the same way I worked my muscles through their early morning sleepiness.
The more I talk about it, the more it becomes clear what “No” might sound like, as well as what “Yes’s” might come out. There are (in case you didn’t know) some big ones of both coming up in my future.